unimoosapus:

gayisthenewokay:

if i was bisexual i would use this line all the time

I am bisexual and I will, in fact, be using this in the future

(Source: cantcontrolthegay, via avengersonna)

spookyqueen:

Boyfriend jeans are just any jeans that are way too small for me, if we’re going by past relationships.

phoenix-falls:

malformalady:

Wisconsin snow storm versus flooding in Ireland

Ireland isn’t fucking around with the sealing capabilities of their doors

phoenix-falls:

malformalady:

Wisconsin snow storm versus flooding in Ireland

Ireland isn’t fucking around with the sealing capabilities of their doors

(via jquackles)

flawlesslyash:

Things that guys say that irk my entire being

 i feel like i have found a kindred spirit

(via tofuttiqt)

Cake Boss in a nutshell…

barebackbearyak:

Customer: I want a nice chocolate cake for my young son, and he likes trucks, so could you maybe do a little frosting picture of a truck on the top?

Cake Boss: SOS WHAT WES GUNNA DO IS MAKE A GIANT TRUCK ENTIRELY OUTTA RICE CRISPIES AND COVA DAT IN FONDANT AND IZ GUNNA SHOOT SPARKS AND CATCH FIYAH, POSSIBLY KILLIN YOUR SON IN DA PROCESS.

(via jquackles)

dankii-doll:

Why are so many of the oldest sculptures of humans fat?

cuz thats what was worshiped as fertile, cause if you were fat you were doing good in life and everyone wanted a piece of that. 

Anonymous said: i don't know why, but when i see your face it takes me a moment to breathe again. you are so beautiful. i think i'm falling for you.....

killedmycatatemytailor:

Oh no!! Wait lemme put this soft mattress here to catch you. Oh would you look at that, you’re in my bed.

smooth as fuck

(Source: longhairfordays)

(Source: iraffiruse, via ssherllock)

realjunko:

EVERYONE PUT THIS GIF ON YOUR BLOG IMMEDIATLY IT WILL PROTECT YOU FROM THE VIRUS!!

image

(Source: jolyene, via music-playing-and-water-rushing)